Bubble Wrapped Time

“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

Galatians 2:20

I have been doing full time church ministry for five years. When I first started I remember being told how important it is to manage your work/life balance. In ministry, this is really difficult because your work and your life are the same thing a lot of the time; being a Christian is more than just your nine to five job. If we are striving to be like Jesus then it’s an every day, every moment kind of commitment. Because of this, a lot of pastors actually struggle with the work/life balance – focusing too much on the ‘work’ end of the scale and missing out on time with family or having hobbies and friends. Whenever I attend a class, training session or leadership event with other pastors, they often will talk about this ‘balance’ – focusing on the struggle of putting more weight on the work side – because that’s usually what ends up happening! I have found that because of all of the cautions and reminder that I have had that I have tried so hard not to lean towards the ‘work side’ that I have created an unhealthy barrier of protection around the ‘life side’. I don’t necessarily focus too much on the ‘life’ part. I think that’s impossible unless you’re irresponsible and working less than your allotted 40-50 hours a week. But, it’s almost as if I have taken the life part and wrapped it in rolls of bubble wrap to protect it. That life part over here? That’s mine to do with as I please. Don’t invade it or take time from it. It’s ‘my precious’ (cue Gollum voice and image of creepy hands stroking the ring). The thing I’ve been realizing is that, when we hold our time as our very own, we miss out on opportunities from God, because we are too busy thinking about how to use OUR own, precious time.

Why do we not think about our time as being another thing that we have to turn over to God? Until recently, I had never thought of surrendering my time. I’ve thought of the need to surrender almost everything else in my life, but for some reason, because time is not concrete – it’s unseen – I never thought of it as something to surrender. And even now that I have thought about the need to surrender it, it’s so hard to do! Why do we not want to give it up? I think we don’t want to give it up because it’s one of the big things that we can’t control – ever. We can control how we use our time, but time continues to move forward, each moment of each day, no matter what we do. So, grasping as much of it as we can is a must. It’s out of our control so we want to control what we can. It’s not a bad thing to want to use our time well and to fill our days with good things. I am all for that! But, are you living as if your time is your own?

I have two questions for you: 1. What do you do with your time? 2. How does your heart feel about your time?

Time to evaluate and do a heart check! How can you know if you are struggling, as I am, to surrender your time to Jesus? One way you can know is by how you answered the above questions. In particular, if one of the answers that you might have to question two relates to you being the one in charge. Ah, control . . . my nemesis! Our desire to grasp control is sneaky because there are two totally different ways that it can present itself in our lives. First, it can sneak in when we are conscious of how we are using our time, making deliberate choices to fill it with what we want (even good things!). Emphasis on the words “what WE want” and not what God wants. Second, (and most surprisingly!) we are controlling even when we are lazy and lack intention with how we use our time. Again, it’s what we want and not what God wants!

How we spend our time might be a great indicator to evaluate if we are being selfish with it – but it’s more than that. The outside may look good (or not!), but how do you really FEEL about your time? When someone asks for your help, do you automatically feel protective over your ‘free’ evening to watch TV or read a good book? There’s nothing wrong with watching TV or reading (or spending time with family, games nights with friends, or household chores, etc). But, is there room for Jesus to lead and be a part of all the times of your day? Or have you also taken your time and bubble wrapped it to hold it safe and secure? I read my Bible every morning. That’s my allotted time for that and it’s good that I have set aside that time there. But, what if I have a free evening? Why is reading my Bible and spending more time with Jesus not on my list of things I could do? Or, when I’m busy prepping for Fall ministry at work and running all of the errands, why do I rush around Dollarama trying to get all of the things and thinking only of what I have to do? What if I opened my eyes to see who God might have me be kind to as I busily shuffle around the store?

What’s the reason that you don’t spend time reading God’s word every day? Is it because your time is your own and you’d rather watch a show on Netflix or scroll social media? What about the reason that you don’t serve in your church and/or community? Maybe you feel your time is yours to use as you please. That kind of commitment could get in the way of your free time in the evenings after work or school. What’s the reason you don’t show up to church on Sunday morning? Because you’d rather sleep in and relax? It’s now about what you would rather do because, after all, it’s your time. Don’t worry, I’m able to share such great excuses because I’ve used every single one of these myself as I bubble wrap and hold my time dear. When you think about it, do you feel like you have this sense of entitlement over your time? This is another one of those heart check moments. For instance, I do a lot of things in a day that are centered around God. But, I have only given Jesus blocks of time in my day (I know, how very generous of me? . . . ). He has from 6-7 am as I write in my blog each morning. He also has from 7-8 am as I sit and pray and read His word. Then there’s the whole 9-5 work day at the church. Then there’s the odd evening Soup Kitchen board meeting or Bible Study . . . so a few hours here or there. That means that most of my evenings and my days off are MINE. And honestly, that’s exactly how I think of them. My time is mine to do with as I please. Pass the tape and the bubble wrap, please!

Galatians 2:20 is a great reminder that, as Christians, our life and our time are not our own: “I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” Surrender your time to Jesus. Honestly, even while spending all week writing this post, I have not done a great job at it! This is hard. But, I truly believe being aware of the need for change in your life is a great first step. The next step? Be willing to go all in with God. And then, ask Him for help. This is definitely something we cannot do on our own. But with Him, we can do all things. So, save the bubble wrap for what it was meant to be used for: wrapping delicate gifts, moving day and sending packages, and give up your time to the only One who can control it and live outside of it.

“He has made everything appropriate in its time. He has also put eternity in their hearts, but no one can discover the work God has done from beginning to end . . . I know that everything God does will last forever; there is no adding to it or taking from it.”

Ecclesiastes 3:11 &14

Written by: Justine Joy